What the *** is happening to me?
I am not depressed, I am not feeling anything but ....plain aimless
During A-Levels, I have never stopped and think about why I'm going through everyday as it is because everyday in my life is filled with things I enjoy, things although I don't enjoy much , I learn from it. Things that could brighten up my day in one way or another. I have more choices to deviate from being bored and depressed.
In Uni, now, I always have a feeling of mundaneness having to repeat the routine over and over again. Oh ok. Today is Sunday. AGAIN. Tomorrow is monday. I have stats,then prac. Then the next day's Tuesday....blebblabla....
When you stop for just awhile, and start to think WHY are you doing this? why are you going through the same days with the same things, meetings, activities, study study study...it's freaking boring!!!
Most the fridays however, I have NUSPE sessions, although i'm hell rotting in my piano skills, after i hear the tune of the piano, I get VERY VERY VERY touched. The feeling is just different from the boring routine days I go through every week. Nothing can substitute the sound music emanating from the piano. I MISS MY PIANO . and my piano is stacked with loads of junks for now. sobsobsobsobsob.....
Each and everything when I feel down at home, I would stick to my piano for HOURS till I get well and rejuvenated. Now, I just don't know what I can do to ease my emotions.
I hate the feeling of missing...
Hate studying..who doesn't..
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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